don't hate it cause you ain't it

Wednesday, March 19, 2014

Ahhh I've been gone for over a month. In my defense, February is the shortest month. Also, I went to Lewisburg, PA and San Juan, Puerto Rico during February! (Among other predictable work trips.)

For a nice juxtaposition, here are a couple pics:

the library on a snowy grey day in central PA (Ray Bucknell!)

mom and sis on a stroll near our hotel in San Juan

view from the balcony one morning!

I cannot post any more Puerto Rico pictures here because I haven't even managed to post any to facebook yet (sorry, Beck!). I can tell I'm getting older because I'm becoming increasingly worse at social media. Pretty soon I'm going to be tagging other people's photos and commenting on relationship break ups with "What happened???!"

Anyway, I do this thing where if I don't blog for a while and want to write a new post I feel like I have to post something awesome. Then I can't think of anything awesome, so I delay even more. The more I delay, the more awesome I feel the post needs to be, the less ideas I have. And so on.

This could be the basic infrastructure for most vicious cycles of unproductivity in life.

It gets to the point where I feel in the next post I either need to give each of my readers a free trip to Hawaii, or never ever blog again, and potentially we should just turn off the internet, you guys. Who needs it?

I struggle with extremes.

But then I reach the extreme where I'm like "anything is better than nothing" So, speaking of nothing, I decided to write to you about the goals I set last week.

I was traveling to South Dakota solo so wanted to spice things up. I decided to set 2 goals for the week:
1. Say "don't hate it cause you ain't it" three times in a professional setting
2. order some nice, comfy pajama pants online


I accomplished neither. The pursuit of number 1 is still ongoing - I decided to extend the timeline, as it turns out there aren't all too many chances to squeeze this stellar gem into conversation in an appropriate way. But it is one of my all-time favorite cocky phrases. Others in the top 10? "if you got it, flaunt it" and of course, the infamous, "it ain't trickin if you got it."

I do this thing where I continuously lie to myself about the affordability of J. Crew, so, in pursuit of number 2, I was trying to shop for pajama pants on J. Crew's website.

So glad I did. Because this:

Twelve hundred dollars. On an article of clothing that, by the way, you don't wear OUT OF THE HOUSE. This totally made me have flashbacks of my Bitter is the new black fashion post from a couple years back. Because, really, the only question in this case (to quote family guy) is HHHHHHHHHHwhy?

My favorite part? For $10, you can add a monogram. What's $10 to someone who's buying a $1,200 cashmere robe? I mean, that's 0.83% of the cost. If you're willing to spend hundreds of dollars on an accessory to your pajamas, why wouldn't you get it monogrammed? Might as well get it plated in 24 carat gold and while you're at it, where is the servant that can bring me my diamond-studded slippers? I can only sit at my table Saturday mornings drinking coffee if I know the clothing I'm wearing exceeds most people's weekly income.

This caused me to make goal #3: I just want to find the subset of the population who orders these robes, force them to watch endless videos on world hunger, buy them all snuggies, and call it a day. I am of course fearful that one of the cashmere-clad group will combat my effort with a sassy "don't hate it cause you ain't it." At which point, I'll be at a loss.

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